In my first book, Theophilus, I dealt with how the wearing of a Packers t-shirt in Metro Washington, D.C. inspired the kind outreach in a biking mishap by a fellow Packer fan, also born in Wauwatosa, WI (see original post here). In this my second book, I ask, "Did the wearing of a New York Jets Tim Tebow shirt bring bad luck and hinder assistance during a Metro DC running incident?"Thanks again, Steve, for sharing this most recent sport attire incident with us. But really: Tebow? Jets? Had to be a freebie...no way you would have paid for that! And obviously, it sure didn't garner you any major assistance points either, did it?
Having already slept in the Tebow t-shirt, I rolled out of bed, changed from my Clareware pajama bottoms to running shorts, donned my freshly washed Catholic Charities disaster relief baseball hat, laced up the Sauconys, and prepared my wrists with my runners watch and "in case of emergency, call..." band. (Editor's note: any brands out there reading this...send the product placement mention royalties to me, please, not Steve. That is all...)
On this muggy Saturday morning, but a few hours from a spring thunderstorm, I began to sweat profusely as I ran around a campus block. Somewhat early on a Saturday morning, there were few university students to offer up a thumbs up or thumbs down to my New York Jets Tim Tebow t-shirt. As I ran around the block that constitutes the CUA Dufour Sports Center, I spotted an opening to the gate of the athletic track and chose the modern running track over the cracked sidewalk and streets -- much easier on the knees.
About 30 minutes later, attempting to exit the outdoor track through the same gate, I noticed that the gate was now locked shut. Hmm, adorned by my New York Jets Tim Tebow t-sirt, I ran around the premises to determine whether any other gates were unlocked. No luck; furthermore, the sports center building was locked. Basically, Theophilus, I was locked inside the outdoor athletic facility at The Catholic University of America. Would I be fed to the lions in this 21st century Coliseum?
Like all modern campuses, this one also has emergency phones ALL OVER THE PLACE. So, I approached the standard and called Security. I explained that I was a resident of one of the halls, had entered the track through an unlocked gate, but was now locked inside. The dispatcher assured me that she would send someone over to escort me through the building and off the premises.
A few minutes later, I waved down a robust security officer. He asked what I was doing on the grounds. I explained that the track gate was unlocked but was now locked. He looked at my New York Jets Tim Tebow t-shirt and asked, "Do you have a (University) ID?" I answered, "Yes, in my room...".
When he asked for any ID, I did wave my wrist at him, with the emergency band info to call in times of trouble! After looking at my shirt and asking me a few more times how I got inside the track and if I had an ID, he finally unlocked the sports center, and led me through the building. As I mentioned, it was rather humid, and my Sauconys did pick up some moisture and mud during the morning run, so I did almost wipe out on the stairs in the athletic center as he escorted me out the building. Great, I thought, first this guy wonders what the stranger with the New York Jets Tim Tebow t-shirt is doing running on our locked track; then, he breaks an ankle on our stairway while being escorted off the property.
He asked if I were OK, and I replied, "No worries, sir; I always use hand rails on stairs."
Moral of the story: "Packer gear: Don't leave home without it.
Which leads me to the Editor's moral of the story: it's great to be a Packers fan! Just be sure to wear your gear! (In fact, you can get some great Packer Fans United gear here.)! Get the respect you deserve! Don't be forced to wear some funky Jets-Tebow stuff. It's just not worth it, man. C'mon...order today!!!
Go Pack Go!!!